D. B. DEVILLIERS

Poetry

Month: September, 2019

And There Shall Be No More Death

I think I’ll probably live in that moment forever
if only I could live there forever
if only it could have been one of the
good ones or at least the not awful ones if
only I could live forever there where the stunned
disbelieving still held power there’s
a knock on the door nine
forty seven pm there’s been
the worst thing anyone’s ever said
there’s been wash your hands with
warm water don’t use heroin vaccinate drive the
speed limit don’t hold the kickback
brake to the forward handle on the saw there’s
change your oil don’t run yellows don’t
drive drunk we’ll come get you
make your bed
take your vitamins
make friends
play sports
study
try
try and you’ll make it
but there’s worst thing anyone’s ever heard the
worst thing anyone’s ever said
there’s been an accident
and if I could live forever
if I could live forever
sometimes you follow the rules and sometimes there’s just
nothing to be done
killed instantly they said but don’t you
think they always say that
and but what did you do except unwittingly
intercept the deviant trajectory of an unconscious man who
should have been piloting his seven thousand pound
vehicle and sometimes you just don’t get to know why
you just don’t get to know why
do we even really exist
and if we don’t then can we really no longer exist
somewhere else in time or space does that
awful closed casket find love find peace make peace
you just can’t know.

Notes Circa November 2012 Yeah I’m Still Hung Up

I was going to say something
but now I can’t remember
it was almost seven years ago and
I listened to that song
I remember where I was at that intersection turning
left up the state route for a five hundred mile
trip and goddamn did my heart almost just explode when
I thought of you
and I called you when I was there
I remember
there were two payphones I had to wait
til seven thirty at night to call you
do you remember
and so much like you have no idea so much did
I wish there were anything I could do
well I guess there was
I called you and your voice was enough
but you know what I mean by I wish I’d done anything
fifteen minutes at a time but man we ran that didn’t we
I don’t know what you thought of me
I’ve never been good at that sort of thing
and I made promises
I don’t believe I kept a single one
I don’t believe you promised me anything
you were always more honest
it was only a year or so ago that
I went back out to detroit
a little more than a year
and I sat in that room from which I called you
and again I thought my heart might explode
but for different reasons
one of those things
and I wished
I wished and wished
but you can’t travel time can you
where did the hope go
I don’t know
let me know if you find it.