The Author vs. The Protagonist’s One True Wonderful Idealized Love

by dbdevilliers

What a wonderful pretty thing you are
and oh it hurts it hurts
I’d like for you to do such terrible things to me
and I to you
such nice and terrible things
shame I’m so far away from this everything
scene in the movie cuts soundtrack to tinnitus white noise ring
protagonist gazes about him at people continuing
conversations he cannot hear
blurred perimeter
good looking people smile very white smiles
laugh surely very honest laughs if we could hear them over the
riiiiiiiiiinggggg
left right pan
where the fuck am I
who the fuck are these people
where are they
who the fuck am I
and you you electric master of all creation
though I carry all the weight and merit of the protagonist
and the author
I cannot speak to you
or will I ever
any longer
or ever
you’re too too
words fail.