A Friendless Narcissus

by dbdevilliers

Friendly plans made among friends
to engage in activities which
characterize and largely
comprise friendship—
we’ll get a beer next time I’m in town
next time you come around
like the old days
like the not good but better than these days, days
past by—
plans made without any real intent
desire, or expectation on either end
of follow-through.

It happens a number of times
here and there, over the course of
a couple of years
and that’s how you wake up one
morning clear and brisk
quite
alone.

But you’ve always enjoyed your
own company, enjoyed it more than just
about anyone else’s
so solitude most of the time isn’t any
sort of burden
and it’s often very much your preference
though you don’t resent people in any general sense,
you rather actually tend to like them,
you just like yourself
just a little bit
too
much
and therefore in the end, yourself is
all you get
and you’re the only reason why.


Self-criticism, in verse.